Note: the following image is disturbing

but it says it all.

Peter Pan Syndrome

I am most definitely suffering from the Peter Pan Syndrome, otherwise known as the "I never (ever) want to grow up" syndrome.

Today, while I was cleaning out my car (a complete car makeover ;-) it dawned on me that in less than 5 months I will be . . . alone. Best Friend and I were chatting about this bright future of mine (smirk) when she remarked, "M. we all believe in you, we really do . . . you just don't." I could be devoured in pride and I am, admittedly. Growing up is like soap in my grip--I cannot grasp it. No pity parties for me, please, I know what I need to do . . .

But I have this overwhelming sense of failure and I haven't even started yet.










Oh well, c'est la vie. I just hope it ends well.

Honest. . .

swear on an old tooth and cross my heart and hope to die this was the most honest Christmas our house has seen yet.

I hope yours was as well.

home is where . . .

the insanity begins.

or otherwise is endured. However, it's been a much better stay than the past few. Which is a nice change of weather.

Secretly all I wanted was a week to read all the chapters i've missed this past semester and write my long poem, the one I've been dreaming about. I cannot find the book I wanted to read and there is not one working pen to be held in this house. :-(

Speaking of changes in weather it looks like it will be a warmer Christmas in the midwest. It makes the children gloomy and us who detest the winter smile in gladness.


Merry Christmas- here is a note:

Dear Friends and family.

I love you. Dearly.

Always,
M.

He told me that they were unlike any others

Today is one that could live forever in my mind.
I will miss her terribly. I will miss this friendship. I love her very much. She is my inspiration. I hope to one day inspire someone the way she has inspired me. I wish to her succeed. I wish to see her happy. I wish Virginia was 911 miles closerto me.

The testing of my Sanity

two down,


three to go.





this could very well be the end of me

(or I'm being melodramatic)


bisous!
M.

on angels

If an angel fell off a cloud, would he leave a hole /in a river and would the hole float along endlessly/ filled with the silent letters of every angelic word? Billy Collins

snowglobes, a holiday indulgence

This is what I love about snowglobes:

1- they make me and mostly everyone smile
2- the snow never melts
3- it's beautiful even in a blizzard
4- you could put a toothpick in the middle and they would still be fascinating
5- they are fine with or without music
6- they make you feel big (a good kind of big)
7- they are enchanting
8- you can shake it all you want
9- they should eventually have all seasons in a globe
10- a little world, inside a ball (or half moon), very surreal

Sleeping in Saturdays

Saturdays are for sleeping in.

By accident the structure of my schedule has prevented this and Sunday's are usually researved for sleeping in (i'm blessed by a church service that doesn't begin until almost noon).

Sleeping in on Sunday's are just not the same as Saturdays.







Today I slept in. Celebration.

Oh My Soul!

"I had a catharsis. I swear. All term in Greek drama I've been trying to figure out what it was and now I know, I had one! When you started dying I felt I was dying. I am drained. Purged. Oh, you were so Greek!"
-Maragret from Brown Girl, Brownstones by Paule Marshall



What a compliment: You were so Greek!






On another completely different note: I think the use of mistletoe should be more prominent in the midwest. I need to brush up on those old kissin' skills ;-)



currently reading: Field, Spring 2005 issue.